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“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Did you know that consciously practicing gratitude can help improve your physical and psychological health? 

Did you know gratitude can enhance empathy, reduce aggression, improve self-esteem, and increase mental health?

Practicing gratitude is another vital component of iLEAD Antelope Valley’s approach to social-emotional learning (SEL), which is focused on whole-child development. Gratitude begins with increased awareness of our own experiences, and as we become more mindful we realize we have choices when it comes to our emotions. 

And here’s the thing: Gratitude is not just about being thankful; it’s about showing appreciation and returning kindness to others. Another facet of gratitude is the expression of appreciation, when we become active by doing something to show we are thankful. A 2019 study published in the Journal of Happiness Studies found that gratitude is linked to happiness in children by age five. By instilling in learners early on the importance of gratitude, we are empowering them for a much fuller life. 

There are four components to gratitude, as identified by UNC Chapel Hill’s Raising Grateful Children Project:

• Noticing: Did someone do something nice for you? Did someone give you something or take you somewhere fun?
• Thinking: What are all the reasons you’re thankful for this? Why do you think someone did something nice for you? Does this mean something to you? 
• Feeling: When you think about these special things or people, how do you feel?
• Doing: What can you actively do to express your gratitude for this person, place, or thing? 

Gratitude helps support social communication because it helps us understand others’ feelings, practice empathy, and learn the social power of kindness and appreciation. It also supports emotional development. Gratitude helps kids notice what makes them feel good and take time to focus on that. 

True gratitude isn’t an action that needs to be taken as much as it’s an attitude to be cultivated so that gratefulness and kindness can become natural responses in our lives. Gratitude doesn’t simply happen; it must be practiced. And when it is, it has the power to change lives. Kids who know how to show appreciation, thankfulness, and kindness are kids who can — and will — change the world. 

Watch: On Gratitude

At iLEAD Antelope Valley, we believe when kids learn how to face challenges, they grow into leaders. As part of our emphasis on social-emotional learning (SEL), we believe it’s important to develop what we call a growth mindset.

Let’s do a quick test. Do you tend to agree or disagree with the following statements?

• My intelligence is something I can’t change very much.
• I’m a certain kind of person, and there isn’t much I can do to change that.
• I often get frustrated when I get feedback on my performance.
• Trying new things is stressful, and I avoid it.

How we respond to these statements reveals whether we have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. Many children are raised and exposed to situations that create a fixed mindset, which may seem harmless on the surface, but actually creates long-term challenges for them in school and in life, when they fear failure and tend to avoid challenges.

Conversely, children who have a growth mindset are more likely to learn from their mistakes, tackle challenges head-on, and be motivated to succeed. 

Some contrasting statements may be helpful for bringing this into focus:

• A fixed mindset says: “Failure is the limit of my abilities.”
• A growth mindset says: “Failure is an opportunity to grow.”

• A fixed mindset says: “I’m either good at it or I’m not.”
• A growth mindset says: “I can learn to do anything I want.”

• A fixed mindset says: “My abilities are unchanging.”
• A growth mindset says: “Challenges help me grow.”

• A fixed mindset says: “My potential is predetermined.”
• A growth mindset says: “My effort and attitude determine my abilities.”

• A fixed mindset says: “Feedback and criticism are personal.”
• A growth mindset says: “Feedback is constructive.”

• A fixed mindset: “I stick to what I know.”
• A growth mindset says: “I like to try new things.”

The development of a healthy growth mindset is all about helping kids realize and embrace their potential and equipping them to be empowered and fueled by challenges, rather than hindered by them.

A growth mindset will intrinsically motivate children to improve, learn, and grow in school and all other areas of their lives.

Writing in Scientific American, psychologist Carol S. Dweck unpacked “The Secret to Raising Smart Kids” and the importance of fostering a growth mindset, stressing the importance of seeing success as the result of hard work instead of simply inborn talent.

“When we gave everyone hard problems anyway, those praised for being smart became discouraged, doubting their ability,” she wrote. “In contrast, students praised for their hard work did not lose confidence when faced with the harder questions, and their performance improved markedly on the easier problems that followed” (emphasis ours).

Make no mistake, it is good to praise our children for their strengths and talents, but it is crucial to encourage them to see challenges as opportunities and to value their efforts. If they can learn and embrace this at school age, there’s no telling what they may achieve. 

Watch: On Growth Mindset